Rookie

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I did enter my first ever competition and I was proud of myself for ‘turning up’. I had read it a thousand times perpetually distracted looking for spelling errors and grammar issues. Then, feeling fairly ok with it, I submitted it.

Then about three days later I went back and read it… And I’d repeated two words twice and that had damaged the flow of the poem. And, of course, then I noticed some idiosyncrasies with it. Then I realised that it contained fatal flaws and that there was no hope in hell of it even being taken remotely seriously. So! Rather than wait to be told it was either shit or ineffective – I’ve corrected what I could and posted it as I would have wanted it to vaguely be.

 

Armed with Paper

 

Strong prisons can have paper bars

Creating books with empty memoirs

And blackout ceilings of Latin Decrees

Where only the poor are cut off at the knees

 

Exempting only inmates of bloodied Titles

Conversations translated with bias subtitles

On a malleable foundation of benefit hate

Privilege redefining the disabled sick fate

 

Knowledge is power so they increase the security

Plunging Internet light into controlled dark obscurity

Foreshadowed by brandings breathing in an enclosure

Ninety Nine will fall when One controls the exposure

Question 3

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Question 1 was answered here. https://conceptswriter.com/2016/01/24/82/

Question 2 was answered here. https://conceptswriter.com/2016/01/26/question-2/

So we are now at question

  1. Is there a difference between the description at the back of the book and a summary?

Well for a start, yet again, I have asked the wrong question. Question 2 created the Blurb (back of the book), Question 1 explained a Pitch so Question 3 should actually be:-

3. How do I write a Synopsis?

Firstly you might not realise it yet but you need a Synopsis to submit to a Publisher.

Nowadays (2016 anyways) many/most Publishers (sometimes called Publishing Houses) no longer accept direct submissions (even if you have wrote the best book in the World). And the same applies if you are trying to get a Literary Agent. Bottom Line seems to be – Nobody has the Time.

So you need to have a kickass Cover Letter and a Super Synopsis instead. (I know – It really does feel like ‘brown trousers’ time). This is all about making ‘First Contact’ (like with aliens only slightly scarier and involving less Tribbles. If you got the ‘Tribble-joke’ ….Marry Me?)

But! The good news is that if you already have a Blurb or a Pitch – you’re not starting from scratch.

Start with a Brief Summary of your Novel

Lets get the lengths right first (remember: Nobody has the Time…apparently).

A brief summary should be about 40 – 80 words. Make them count (no pressure). This should also be familiar if you read Question 1 or 2.

I would start with Title (Concepts), Genre (I still have problems with this but, long sigh: Fantasy Drama with a dash of Dark Humour), Type (Novel), Protagonist (Main Character), Situation (could be location or situation or both), What (is vaguely going to happen), Why (it’s an issue worth reading 200 pages about) and hopeful Outcome (WITHOUT spoilers, vague intention of outcome).

Don’t ramble, repeat or regress during this. Be Brave.

Now go for a Tea/Coffee break (you’re gonna need the caffeine)

Detailed Synopsis

Don’t be excited by the word ‘Detailed’ – we are looking at about 500 words here (well 400-500).

This involves skill and (if you’ve been writing for a wee while you will understand the next word:) FLOW.

Flow is everything. I have to be honest – It always has been and always will be. Flow in dialogue, Flow in poetry, Flow in scripts.

It is pretty much all that matters. Which is a slight problem because you either have it or you don’t. For the purpose of this post – we’re just going to assume we’ve both got it.

Yes you should reiterate everything in the summary (in a stylish flow) but then you have an opportunity to hook the Reader to your main character and then detail the journey from A (the beginning) to B (the end) with any interesting moments and twists that might arise. Oh and if there are other significant characters – Now is the time to slip them in. Keep it all interesting, engaging and awesome. Show your Flow (eww…that sounds wrong coming from a female writer…lol).

It is an opportunity to show flares of drama, twinkles of twists and convey the Atmosphere and Spirit of your story. You’ll be fiiinne (takes a sip of coffee whilst averting my eyes).

Once you’ve got that out of the way and since we were discussing that the Synopsis is now accepted inplace of a full blown submission – You will need a Cover Letter.

Cover Letters. Urgh. I know. I know. You’ve just been through Hell trying to condense your Baby into a Synopsis but we might as well discuss a Cover Letter to go with your child.

Cover Letter

I have read…so many mind numbingly boring Cover Letters. I think the general logic is ‘Stay Safe’ but I don’t think that this is where to stay safe.  It also doesn’t need to be dangerous. Just remember what you want to say and to use your voice.

  1. Find out WHO you are writing to. Do not start with the phrase (regardless of my joke Tweets) with the phrase ‘Dear Publisher’ or worst ‘Dear Pub’. Do some homework. Do NOT misspell their name. Infact – get someone to proof read your entire cover letter etc for any errors. If you’ve met them before (at a conference etc) – personalise the letter (not too much) – just enough to explain
  2. First Section – Introduce yourself. They don’t need to know what you ate for breakfast – They just want to know who is writing to them – Your Name, any Experience/Work (if related to writing – NOT A CV) awards/credits etc.
  3. Second Section – Your Book. Title, why you wrote it, what makes it interesting/awesome (genre, target audience, if you did any research etc – keep it short)
  4. Third Section – That summary you wrote earlier? Now is the time to deploy it.
  5. Fourth – Say if you are enclosing anything with your letter. THIS is where you submit whatever the Publishers Submission Guidelines ask you for – if they want a Synopsis, a Chapter etc – whatever they say.
  6. Thank them for taking the time to read your letter.
  7. Lets talk about presentation. This is usually in their Submission Guidelines but a safe bet is – quality paper, typed and include a stamped and self-addressed envelop. You want it typed on a computer (no handwriting).
  8. What about email? Well this is where a grey area occurs. It seems that the Publishing World…is about 10 yrs behind all other Worlds. It used to be ‘rude’ to cold email but a few people are now suggesting that it is ‘OK’ as long as it is kept ‘short’ and your cover letter is in the body of the email (not as an attachment…which makes sense). They (infact nobody) will open a blank email.
  9. Keep track of what you are doing. Do not email 3 agents for the same Publishing House with the same story etc.
  10. Even if you wrote to them, remember to include your email on your Contact details at the bottom of your letter.

And that my friends is ‘First Contact’.  Or what is called a ‘Novel Query’.

Writing Group

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Today I joined a Writing Group. I have to admit I was kind of terrified. Mostly because I don’t like humans very much (which given the planet I live on is really an issue I need to overcome).

I also make a terrible first impression and tend to sabotage myself. The humour, which you see on Twitter, becomes uncomfortably dark and my ability to alienate myself levels up exponentially.

But it went well.

I knew it wouldn’t have any younger members because it was in the afternoon and I prefer the wisdom of older people in any case. Older people tend to have learned kindness which is far safer than instinctual kindness. By the time you reach a certain age, you’ve installed a code of conduct onto yourself – values. This means that people don’t tend to be total arseholes. Younger people can be reckless under the guise of honesty when in fact it is just bad impulse control and poor judgement.

Everyone was armed with pads and pens and thankfully I had brought those to ‘blend in’. The laptop sitting in my backpack was ignored for 2 hours. We missed each other.

I won’t lie – I did not make a great impression. I knocked over someone’s water, burned bright red whilst reading out the shortest piece of writing (outside of Twitter) that I have ever created and wanted to shrivel up on numerous occasions and evaporate into dust.

But the Tutor/Facilitator – He was pretty damn amazing. I could learn a lot from him. He had a great ability to create a good atmosphere and promote thinking.

He had me considering things that I have never ever thought about before.

The Group Session was about Tradition, History and Roots – all topics which I…struggle to connect to as I do not have a strong family dynamic and mostly raised myself.

And most of the group were talking about Traditions that were created long before I was even born. But it was interesting. It was interesting how the group could connect with each other and relate to each other because they are all from a similar…era (oh that sounds rude and bad. It is not intended that way).  In comparison (and don’t kid yourself – we all run subconscious and conscious comparisons in any group situation) I stood out like a sore thumb.

But like I said – the Tutor was a great man. Even a day later, I am still pondering things about the concept of ‘Tradition’ which I have never dwelled on before.

I do need to improve my writing but I must also improve myself. I think this group might help this development.

Oh, and I wrote this (it’s awful but maybe in a year from now we can all go ‘Whoa – look how you improved!)

 

Engineers and Mathematicians

Fleeing Wars to find Home

Only to be lost in the cold

And Coughed up on the West Coast

 

Near Oceans and Salt

Traditions of hard work or blending

Settling Down in Schemes

The roots belong to a different Forest.

 

It’s a bit random. But my family is broken and never recovered from fleeing the World Wars. And I see the world repeat its hatred of refugees without realising the knowledge and riches they could gain from new people. Without getting too into politics – I wish that the world could retain knowledge of past mistakes and break the cycle of ignorance that always comes round.

the pitch

Question 1: What is a Book/Novel Pitch?

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I have about a thousand questions re. Publishing which really do demonstrate my ignorance but since I plan on excelling this year – I suppose starting off a bit stupid means the only way is up.

Tonight I did not write. Instead I started to try and figure out the answers to many questions

  1. What is a Book/Novel Pitch?
  2. How do you summarise a book without…well…ruining it?
  3. Is there a difference between the description at the back of the book and a summary?
  4. What should I write to Publishers?
  5. Should I use a Publisher? Is it better to self-Publish?
  6. What if my stories just a bit shit?
  7. Could I withstand a barrage of negative feedback?
  8. Am I actually ready to be an author? A creator of worlds?

This post will deal with Number 1: What is a Pitch (gathered from days of reading publishers blogs and writers pitches)

So

  1. A book/novel pitch is (and feel free to leave comments, correct me or drop a tweet @wrytes2016) a pitch designed to sell your novel to Publishers or an Agent.

Since I don’t want an Agent (see I know one thing) (and I cannot afford one)– we’ll just focus on the Publisher.

A pitch can be written or spoken. Apparently you learn a lot about pitches from Writers Conferences….well I can’t afford the cost of getting there, travelling and being able to eat at the same time. I also live in Scotland. And for some reason in my small, yet epic country, most of those conferences seem to be in September. It is January – I am not waiting.

I did find one in March but the website was appallingly out of date and looked like it was made during a Demo to basic HTML seminar which did not reassure me.

It also looks like, at least where I live, that whilst it’s not mandatory to join a Writing Group – it’s made damn difficult to attend any Writing Conferences without a club membership.

If you are like me and simply can’t afford it – there are Novel pitches (of varying qualities) on YouTube that are worth checking out (and useful for working out what to do and what not to do).

Right so back to basics – Apparently the best pitches (according to all of the many sites I visited) have great Taglines.

You might be familiar to Taglines because Movies have those.

Alien vs. Predator (2004) – “Whoever wins, we lose.”

Arachnophobia (1990) – “Eight legs, two fangs, and an attitude.”

The Big Lebowski (1998) – “Her life was in their hands. Now her toe is in the mail.”

Catch Me If You Can (2002) – “The true story of a real fake.”

And so on. You get the idea. A Tagline, in a weird way, does actually contain quite a lot of information. Take the shortest one there, Aliens vs. Predator “Whoever wins, we lose”. You can assume that the ‘we’ is humanity. So it does imply a scary outside force – alien in nature at the very least. We know that there are at least two scary Protagonists. And we know that our entire species is screwed regardless of outcome. I’ve never watched those Movies (ducks and hides under a box) but that is what I’m assuming.

By applying that method guide, you have a Protagonist/s and the Problem in the tagline.

Whilst I don’t have a Tagline yet, I could probably work on –

So why is Death, one of the most powerful Concepts in creation, on a drip in a hospital?

Or

He didn’t solve their problems – he started them

Or

Powerful enough to change physics, Weak enough to make Mistakes.

Or

He fell and unravelled reality. He claims it was an oversight.

You get the idea. It actually becomes surprisingly easy once you get started. Maybe in ten or twenty years I will find a decent tagline.

There is another form of ‘Tagline’. And I do not personally like it but I should mention it just to put it out there– The Hollywood Approach. And they look like this – Sherlock Holmes meets Armageddon or Avatar meets Jane Austen or Shades of Grey meets a Good Writer. You get the idea (the last one was just a joke). The Hollywood approach is where you merge well known works to describe your work. I don’t like it.

Moving On.

The core of your pitch which we’ll call GRAB (I know terrible phrasing) is basically an embellished intro to the heart of your books conflict ie. it is about your main character and their struggles. It also demonstrates why people buy trashy magazines –

We want drama and conflict.

And so do Readers – even if it’s written with Dickensian wit, Pratchett Prose (I miss you so much) or Edgar Allan Poe atmosphere. We want Conflict. Without getting too philosophical – look at the state we’ve put this planet into. We want drama.

Focus on the core, the heart, the crux of your story.

Which is quite hard to do.

My story might be about supernatural powers and the inevitable threat to existence itself but…really…strip it back…it’s about a Family (a damn weird, broken, confused yet slightly epic Family).

Your grab, your crux, the heart – that is your Hook (according to half of google and Publishers blogs).

It’s like Extreme Fishing/the board game ‘Operation’ combined. You are essentially trying to reach the heart of your publisher, squeeze it to get their attention and then pull slightly so that after you leave – they never forget the feeling (and you can tell I’ve been reading a Horror Novel today).

Timing:-

Your pitch cannot last 40 hours. It has to be quick (much like my ex-boyfriend but with more significance).

We are literally talking 3 minutes at a Pitch Fest. These are busy people. They need to get to know your Protagonist but not what your Protagonist would eat for breakfast (mine doesn’t eat breakfast because he sleeps late).

But don’t rush (yes I am aware of the paradox). Just make sure that what you say is vital and memorable. Practice your pitch with honest friends (not the ones who enjoy being asses or the ones that are too nice – you are looking for your most honest friends or a Writing Group -a good one).

A novel pitch actually seems to follow most types of creative pitches – Who it is about (Protagonist), What is the Problem? What are the Consequences of decisions?

So the Layout of a Pitch:-

TAGline (hook em!)

GRAB the Heart (tell them about the Protagonist/s and why they should care)

DRAMA! (The conflict of your story – what is DRIVING your characters)

RESOLVE – often miswritten (only in my opinion) as ‘the Resolution’. Resolve should not actually reveal the ending. It should say what you would need to do to resolve the issue.

e.g. (not the greatest literally example on the planet) – In order to save his sister, Luke needs to work with his demented, quirky, inhuman brother and try to avoid being murdered by a private army.

Ok so I need to work on my pitch. But you get the vague idea. It doesn’t reveal the ending but does suggest the path.

So –TAG, GRAB, DRAMA!, RESOLVE.

It kind of looks like a ballet routine.

Length:-

TAGline can be (looks at novels in my library and various publishers) about 10-25 words or 2 sentences, preferably 1.

GRAB (your protagonist, why the reader/audience should care) – 4 to 6 sentences?-ish

DRAMA! (the problem) – You could probably get that to 2 sentences.

RESOLVE (NOT your ending just your pathway)– Could be 1-2 sentences.

I am also aware that people write different length sentences. I have a friend that does one sentence paragraphs (I do not enjoy beta reading their stuff). Best solution is to Practice and Time your pitch. 3 minutes for a Pitch Fest, 5 for a Writers Conference and 10 for a smaller group or meeting. Practice ALL THREE VERSIONS. Be Adaptable.

If you cannot Adapt your Pitch to the Audience’s needs at the time – you’re in trouble. And what is worse – YOU will know you are in trouble. And once you know you’re in trouble – you’re gonna (unless you are a ninja or an assassin) make mistakes. PRACTICE. And Practice Variants.

All the guides I’ve read seem to say the same thing – DO NOT OVER COMPLICATE THIS!

And I can see their point. After 300 words (which should be your maximum btw) no one is listening. Hell, they are probably checking their phones wondering how long it would take for their entire life to flash before their eyes. And…you want them to want more. Do not overdo it. It is better that they have questions than deafening silence with a bored glazed stare.

Another glitch that lots of readers and publishers seem to avoid or want to avoid (during a pitch), respectively, are Subplots.

We all have them. But in a pitch – you must focus.

FOCUS!

Subplots are great and they evolve. Hell some subplots in book 1 become the main force by book 3. But you are pitching Book 1. Subplots are Sub. They are not the main Plot. Focus on the main plot.

The general rule seems to be (and I could be wrong but there is a shaky consensus here) – If you cannot Tagline, Grab/Drama and Resolve – then you are not focused enough. And if you are unable to focus, it is heavily implied online – that you’re not ready.

Which means…I’m not ready. Shit.

Well at least question 1 is answered.

My Favourite Lines from Jan 4th – 17th

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“Do not play the I-thought-I-could-trust-u card or the i-love-u card. Both are degrading”

“You sure think I’m carrying a huge deck”

– From Concepts B (Book 2 of the Concepts series)

 

“Put your hands in the air or I’ll blow his brains out”

“Doubt it would make a noticeable difference”

– From Reverse Burn

 

“Apparently he knows because I left breadcrumbs in his head”

“God…even on the astral plane you don’t clean up after yourself”

– From Concepts B (Book 2 of the Concepts series)

 

“Did I upset her?”

“You? With that sparkling personality & sensitive soul of yours…”

“I am detecting sarcasm”

“What happened – did you download a patch for your motherboard?” he mused with an eyeroll.

– From Concepts A (Book 1 of the Concepts series)

 

“World’s gonna blow up so I’m burying my cash”

“Please don’t make me repeat that sentence back to you. Did you bury your sanity in there?”

– From Concepts C (Book 3 of the Concepts series)