Bang Head Here

Question 2

Question 2. How do you summarise a book without…well…ruining it

First thing I realised about this question is that I was asking the wrong question. What I am looking for is how to explain my story on the back of the book.

Unhelpfully known as ‘The Blurb’.

Now if you have a Pitch (see Question 1: https://conceptswriter.com/2016/01/24/82/ )– you actually have a blurb ready. A blurb (no matter how other blogs try and dress it up) is a Pitch. A written one.

In the last post I focused on the Verbal Pitch. This time it’s about the Written Pitch.

It seems to follow the same pattern though –

  • A Headline – Which is just a TAGLINE.
  • GRAB the Heart i.e. Why should the reader care about your character
  • DRAMA! Or A Hint of the Journey (literal or metaphoric)& Conflict
  • RESOLVE – (do not reveal the ending) A rough idea of what is needed to overcome the conflict/problem and complete the journey.

Since we all know that I’m procrastinating (see every tweet I’ve ever tweeted @wrytes2016), I should at least go through the process itself.

First I need a Tagline:-

So why is Death, one of the most powerful Concepts in creation, on a drip in a hospital?

He was meant to have the answers; instead he didn’t have a clue.

We all start somewhere, but who knows when to stop.

His mind is fractured, but his Power is absolute.

For the Blurb…urgh can we call it something else? Something better than blurb? Blurb sounds like how writers should fart (grim but accurate).

Let’s call it a Book Blast since that is essentially what it is.

So the Book Blast content should contain the main Protagonist, Location/Setting, Hyperbole, Problem and Solution.

It should be about 150-200 words.

Applying that to my story; Concepts A – it should read.

Luke Pestilence [protagonist] sits in a burning desert [vague suggestion of environment] watching his fate tumble from the sky [about as much hyperbole as I can manage]. He hopes for the answers to his own mysterious powers [the problem] and the location of his sister – what he gets is a shambolic brother with a fractured mind and his own agenda [the solution].

Ok that might be the worst Blast in history. Let’s try this again.

Four People, Four Powers and Four Agendas. [tagline]

He knew something was going to change; he could feel it in his blood and see it written on his skin [protagonist]. Part of him wished to continue his irresponsible simple life but a larger part wanted answers. [problem]

Luke Pestilence watched the screaming skies swirl above him and his fate fall from the darkened sky [hyperbole].

But as the answers give way to more questions and with a brother trailblazing havoc, Pestilence struggles to understand what the hell is actually happening and who he can actually trust [solution].

Ok I have introduced you too the second worst blurb in history. Third time lucky? Maybe a fusion of the two.

Luke Pestilence [protagonist] sits in a burning desert [setting/location]watching his fate tumble from the sky. As his simple human life burns to as [hyperbole]h, he hopes for the answers to his own mysterious powers [problem]– what he gets is a shambolic brother with a fractured mind and his own agenda. [solution]

Hm…ok we have 53 words. That is quite short compared to the 150 that I would need here.

Let’s take a break to talk about something I found useful last year (go make a cuppa tea and come back whilst I ponder on our next course of Book Blast action)…(seriously go – stop reading – it is time for a cup of tea or coffee….this is serious business) –

BREAKTIME: Whilst you sip your tea, let’s talk about Nanowrimo. #Nanowrimo (as it is hashtagged) is actually National November Writing Month and it is great for kicking your ass into gear. It encourages you to write a little bit of your novel each day (about 1680 words a day) and encourages a Community involvement. A Community is good because it creates Accountability. I must admit I attended Nanowrimo meet-ups and it was very good and fun. I felt a little abandoned once it was all over but I had certainly created my novel (or at least a very damn good outline).

I have to also admit that I originally thought that Nanowrimo was quite gimmicky – I will always admit when I am wrong. I was wrong. For me, although it might not be the same for everyone, it kicked me into gear.

Nanowrimo has actually been vital in getting me to this stage to start with and more so – before you start your Nanowrimo you have to enter a description of your novel. Sometimes that description changes but it is useful to look back on.

BREAKTIME OVER.

For Concepts the original description was:

The final one has fallen. All the questions should now be answered. So why is Death, one of the most powerful Concepts in creation, on a drip in a hospital?

That reads like a tagline hybrid…a bad one. But it does create mystery.

>sigh< There’s no way around this. I can’t write to Publishers at all without nailing this. And I certainly can’t sell a book without a description.

Ok Internet….any advice here for Question 2: The Back of the Book (part one)?

the pitch

Question 1: What is a Book/Novel Pitch?

I have about a thousand questions re. Publishing which really do demonstrate my ignorance but since I plan on excelling this year – I suppose starting off a bit stupid means the only way is up.

Tonight I did not write. Instead I started to try and figure out the answers to many questions

  1. What is a Book/Novel Pitch?
  2. How do you summarise a book without…well…ruining it?
  3. Is there a difference between the description at the back of the book and a summary?
  4. What should I write to Publishers?
  5. Should I use a Publisher? Is it better to self-Publish?
  6. What if my stories just a bit shit?
  7. Could I withstand a barrage of negative feedback?
  8. Am I actually ready to be an author? A creator of worlds?

This post will deal with Number 1: What is a Pitch (gathered from days of reading publishers blogs and writers pitches)

So

  1. A book/novel pitch is (and feel free to leave comments, correct me or drop a tweet @wrytes2016) a pitch designed to sell your novel to Publishers or an Agent.

Since I don’t want an Agent (see I know one thing) (and I cannot afford one)– we’ll just focus on the Publisher.

A pitch can be written or spoken. Apparently you learn a lot about pitches from Writers Conferences….well I can’t afford the cost of getting there, travelling and being able to eat at the same time. I also live in Scotland. And for some reason in my small, yet epic country, most of those conferences seem to be in September. It is January – I am not waiting.

I did find one in March but the website was appallingly out of date and looked like it was made during a Demo to basic HTML seminar which did not reassure me.

It also looks like, at least where I live, that whilst it’s not mandatory to join a Writing Group – it’s made damn difficult to attend any Writing Conferences without a club membership.

If you are like me and simply can’t afford it – there are Novel pitches (of varying qualities) on YouTube that are worth checking out (and useful for working out what to do and what not to do).

Right so back to basics – Apparently the best pitches (according to all of the many sites I visited) have great Taglines.

You might be familiar to Taglines because Movies have those.

Alien vs. Predator (2004) – “Whoever wins, we lose.”

Arachnophobia (1990) – “Eight legs, two fangs, and an attitude.”

The Big Lebowski (1998) – “Her life was in their hands. Now her toe is in the mail.”

Catch Me If You Can (2002) – “The true story of a real fake.”

And so on. You get the idea. A Tagline, in a weird way, does actually contain quite a lot of information. Take the shortest one there, Aliens vs. Predator “Whoever wins, we lose”. You can assume that the ‘we’ is humanity. So it does imply a scary outside force – alien in nature at the very least. We know that there are at least two scary Protagonists. And we know that our entire species is screwed regardless of outcome. I’ve never watched those Movies (ducks and hides under a box) but that is what I’m assuming.

By applying that method guide, you have a Protagonist/s and the Problem in the tagline.

Whilst I don’t have a Tagline yet, I could probably work on –

So why is Death, one of the most powerful Concepts in creation, on a drip in a hospital?

Or

He didn’t solve their problems – he started them

Or

Powerful enough to change physics, Weak enough to make Mistakes.

Or

He fell and unravelled reality. He claims it was an oversight.

You get the idea. It actually becomes surprisingly easy once you get started. Maybe in ten or twenty years I will find a decent tagline.

There is another form of ‘Tagline’. And I do not personally like it but I should mention it just to put it out there– The Hollywood Approach. And they look like this – Sherlock Holmes meets Armageddon or Avatar meets Jane Austen or Shades of Grey meets a Good Writer. You get the idea (the last one was just a joke). The Hollywood approach is where you merge well known works to describe your work. I don’t like it.

Moving On.

The core of your pitch which we’ll call GRAB (I know terrible phrasing) is basically an embellished intro to the heart of your books conflict ie. it is about your main character and their struggles. It also demonstrates why people buy trashy magazines –

We want drama and conflict.

And so do Readers – even if it’s written with Dickensian wit, Pratchett Prose (I miss you so much) or Edgar Allan Poe atmosphere. We want Conflict. Without getting too philosophical – look at the state we’ve put this planet into. We want drama.

Focus on the core, the heart, the crux of your story.

Which is quite hard to do.

My story might be about supernatural powers and the inevitable threat to existence itself but…really…strip it back…it’s about a Family (a damn weird, broken, confused yet slightly epic Family).

Your grab, your crux, the heart – that is your Hook (according to half of google and Publishers blogs).

It’s like Extreme Fishing/the board game ‘Operation’ combined. You are essentially trying to reach the heart of your publisher, squeeze it to get their attention and then pull slightly so that after you leave – they never forget the feeling (and you can tell I’ve been reading a Horror Novel today).

Timing:-

Your pitch cannot last 40 hours. It has to be quick (much like my ex-boyfriend but with more significance).

We are literally talking 3 minutes at a Pitch Fest. These are busy people. They need to get to know your Protagonist but not what your Protagonist would eat for breakfast (mine doesn’t eat breakfast because he sleeps late).

But don’t rush (yes I am aware of the paradox). Just make sure that what you say is vital and memorable. Practice your pitch with honest friends (not the ones who enjoy being asses or the ones that are too nice – you are looking for your most honest friends or a Writing Group -a good one).

A novel pitch actually seems to follow most types of creative pitches – Who it is about (Protagonist), What is the Problem? What are the Consequences of decisions?

So the Layout of a Pitch:-

TAGline (hook em!)

GRAB the Heart (tell them about the Protagonist/s and why they should care)

DRAMA! (The conflict of your story – what is DRIVING your characters)

RESOLVE – often miswritten (only in my opinion) as ‘the Resolution’. Resolve should not actually reveal the ending. It should say what you would need to do to resolve the issue.

e.g. (not the greatest literally example on the planet) – In order to save his sister, Luke needs to work with his demented, quirky, inhuman brother and try to avoid being murdered by a private army.

Ok so I need to work on my pitch. But you get the vague idea. It doesn’t reveal the ending but does suggest the path.

So –TAG, GRAB, DRAMA!, RESOLVE.

It kind of looks like a ballet routine.

Length:-

TAGline can be (looks at novels in my library and various publishers) about 10-25 words or 2 sentences, preferably 1.

GRAB (your protagonist, why the reader/audience should care) – 4 to 6 sentences?-ish

DRAMA! (the problem) – You could probably get that to 2 sentences.

RESOLVE (NOT your ending just your pathway)– Could be 1-2 sentences.

I am also aware that people write different length sentences. I have a friend that does one sentence paragraphs (I do not enjoy beta reading their stuff). Best solution is to Practice and Time your pitch. 3 minutes for a Pitch Fest, 5 for a Writers Conference and 10 for a smaller group or meeting. Practice ALL THREE VERSIONS. Be Adaptable.

If you cannot Adapt your Pitch to the Audience’s needs at the time – you’re in trouble. And what is worse – YOU will know you are in trouble. And once you know you’re in trouble – you’re gonna (unless you are a ninja or an assassin) make mistakes. PRACTICE. And Practice Variants.

All the guides I’ve read seem to say the same thing – DO NOT OVER COMPLICATE THIS!

And I can see their point. After 300 words (which should be your maximum btw) no one is listening. Hell, they are probably checking their phones wondering how long it would take for their entire life to flash before their eyes. And…you want them to want more. Do not overdo it. It is better that they have questions than deafening silence with a bored glazed stare.

Another glitch that lots of readers and publishers seem to avoid or want to avoid (during a pitch), respectively, are Subplots.

We all have them. But in a pitch – you must focus.

FOCUS!

Subplots are great and they evolve. Hell some subplots in book 1 become the main force by book 3. But you are pitching Book 1. Subplots are Sub. They are not the main Plot. Focus on the main plot.

The general rule seems to be (and I could be wrong but there is a shaky consensus here) – If you cannot Tagline, Grab/Drama and Resolve – then you are not focused enough. And if you are unable to focus, it is heavily implied online – that you’re not ready.

Which means…I’m not ready. Shit.

Well at least question 1 is answered.